Dr. Wayne Carr, Psychologist, focuses on what is of ultimate concern in ... Reality, Psychotherapy, Spirituality, Enlightenment, Meditation, Non-dual & Non-local Consciousness, Remote Viewing, Developmental Stages, Emotional Processes, Critical Thinking, Integration .... everything relating to the Heart, the Mind and Actuality.
The Four Quadrants
My Web Sites
Friday, August 31, 2007
Various Non-connected Thoughts Forming
2: We must distinguish between response-ability (the ability to respond or its opposite: response-inability) and accountability (knowing you are the person who will receive consequences of your actions, inactions and choices.)
The two are entirely different and totally confused.
If you have both predominant response-inability and account-inability, you're pretty much screwed for this lifetime.
We must take responsibility and accountability for what we don't say and what we don't do.
3 There are people who live there live more according to what actually may be inferred
and there are people who live their lives more according to innuendo and what is read in. Most people are of the second type.
4 Most people are utterly incapable of putting everything on the table in terms of what is actually there to be considered and attended to. A shared effort by two of more people to put everything that is truly due concern on the table is nearly non-existent from my point of view.
What may be truly relevant to be on the table, how much attention it initially may deserve and what may be truly irrelevant is a function of intelligence, cognitive and emotional honesty, experience, personal values and developmental level.
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Self-Liberating
surrendering existence as you fall
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Motto
Highest creativity
Highest expression
Highest activity
Highest joy
Deepest shadow work
Deepest feelings
Deepest pain
Deepest release
Deepest ground
Deepest flow
Deepest healing
Deepest truth
Biggest whole
Never lose sight of the whole
Never compromise health
Namaste
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
See Yourself
Every arrow of attention that shoots out sends a twin arrow of attention within
As Emptiness and Form are the same, so are these arrows
These arrows can kill you
Die this moment and your life is returned to you
"Blessed are those who were born before they were born"
Blessed are those who died before they died
Monday, May 28, 2007
The “Gating” of Attention to Symbolic Realities
These realities become all that we know and can even imagine as reality, even if we imagine ourselves as spiritual beings. Our lives, for the most part, become only a symbolic acting out of what we originally “knew” and wanted. We become “should-ists” rather than "is-ists”. We become obsessed with following (or resisting) “shoulds” and “responsibilities”. We end up believing our own propaganda and story about our lives and "happiness" (or lack of it). Currently many of us do a "spiritual bypass" using “spirituality” as a way of avoiding what is in front of our face.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Naked Awareness - Naked Pain
Let naked awareness touch naked pain
Unlock that which is bound up
The unbearable is bared one writhe at a time
Don't hide from the wounds you don't know you have
Crack open futility and hopelessness to reveal the unfelt
Sunday, May 6, 2007
Quotations and sayings from Dr. Carr
(Continually under construction)
One man's "too much intellect" is another man's "to simple and unthinking"
Create your life out of whole cloth
Most stimuli are really responses
Consciousness first, other concerns second
That which is not allowed doesn't get heard
You have no business spending a lot of time in your head if you're not yet firmly based in your heart
People with big egos either tout themselves, or put down others who tout themselves
Too much control eliminate possibility
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
How Truth Comes Through
The truth comes from all existence.
How could it be any other way?
It comes through in spite of any book.
It comes through in spite of any belief or religion.
When you grasp it you are misled.
When you think about it you are misled.
The most amazing thing is that we have such tremendous abilities to keep ourselves from seeing it
Consider just to stop doing what keeps you from the truth.
Consider awakening your passion to discover and find out.
Religion, beliefs and books can often be the tools of the sleepwalker. (We all start as sleepwalkers.)
Relying on them, without transcending them
is like stationing yourself at the sign post without moving on down the road in the direction sign is pointing.
It is also like wearing your clothes in the shower.
When you put them aside you get the full shower.
This "shower" washes away that which is not true.
It washes away our own bull shit and the bullshit in the world.
The water reaches the roots of your being.
What is left is a delightful spacious emptiness that cannot be compared.
Get naked.
In this space you can grow fast.
Feeing Felt
Feeling Felt
Breath Breathed
Thought thought
Existence existed
Nothingness nothinged
Not this, not that. What a relief!
Friday, April 13, 2007
Catch What Eludes You
Catch what eludes you.
Move along dimensions you haven't imagined yet.
Loosen the tight helmet of your own conditioning.
Embody the message of your own experience.
Breathe breathing. Feel what you haven't felt yet.
Waves lapping on the lakeshore for no reason, giving birth to each moment
Each a page in the true book of revelation
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Future Articles to be Published
In the near future I will be posting articles on the following topics:
The Huge Power of Congruency
Integral Poetry
Books, Beliefs and Religion
The fundamental distrusts we have of the human organism: Feeling, spontaneity, self-regulation, anger, intellect, pain, consciousness, non-locality, intuition, ego, spirituality, direct experience, hunger & need.
The largely unrealized implications of non-locality
Liberal vs Conservative: Basic Differences
The "Impass"
Emotional Literacy
Cognitive Literacy
Skepticism and Skeptics
Scientific Stupidity
Integrative Conversations
Basic Tools of Therapy
Self Therapy, Self Primaling
The Role of Pain
Seeing vs Imagining
Data deficits, Data receptors, Data distribution
Existence vs Meaning
Stimulus orientation vs Response orientation
Sunday, February 4, 2007
The "If then" Fallacy
Very very often people will formulate an argument based on an "if" that to some degree simply begs the question. These arguments when simplified sound something like: "if people would change they would be able to change" or "if something was different than what it was, it would be different than what it was". In some ways these kind of contributions can be meaningless. It is like saying " if my grandmother had wheels she'd be a trolley car".
If the "if" part is not very implementable, then the "then" part is not very implementable. Statements like: "If everyone voted responsibly we would not elect incompetent people" and "If we all listened to each other more, there would be less chance of war" are not very productive because the "if" part is not very implementable. Despite this, go to any group discussion and you'll hear plenty of contributions in this format. This is one reason why committees tend to have the reputation of not getting very much done.
Seduction
When I go to the supermarket and look at the physiques of the people around me; when I look in their shopping carts, I get a sense of the average person being seduced. Seduced by their own appetites, seduced by the advertising, seduced by their own self talk & propaganda, seduced by the media, seduced by their peers, seduced by their own "contentment", seduced by strong resistances to eating what one should eat, seduced by the comfort of their own traditions and habits, seduced by what they see everyone else doing.
I then wonder if the process of seduction is one of the main destroyers of our society. People who try to change our society, like politicians, make the mistake of resorting to further seduction. Perhaps the problem is seduction itself.
It seems to me the main counter to this toxic seduction is the feeling of healthy discontent. I then have to ask: what have I been seduced by and what is my unfelt discontent?
---
A newborn, and toddler are supposed to be seduced by their parents. In a healthy "safe" family, they're supposed to be seduced by their mothers tit, their mothers touch, their mother's voice, their own needs and appetites. They also have the means of letting the mother know when they don't want something, when they've had too much of something and when they're discontent. In a healthy family the mother responds appropriately and the child develops appropriately.
In an unhealthy family with a toxic mother the infant's "yeses" and "no's" are not heeded properly and the infant develops defenses and resistances against its own yeses and no's. It still however longs to be "seduced" by its mother and its own needs. Eventually this longing breaks through in adult behavior. The adult is either seduced by his own original longings or seduced by his resistances to his own original longings.
Friday, January 19, 2007
Integral Remote Viewing
What is Remote Viewing?
Remote viewing is a "non-local" technique whereby one can experience being present at an undisclosed location that can be thousands of miles away. One can see, feel, touch, smell hear and be at this distant location just by using one's mind and attention in a special way!
Remote viewing differs from what is referred to as psychic in that it is a highly refined specific sequence of attentional operations that takes about an hour to do. It has built in safeguards to minimize contamination by one's own imagination and belief systems. It creates the possibility of a new "signal purity" and "signal strength" previously attainable by only a few if any.
Exactly what you are remote viewing is disclosed to you only after your session, by the person who possesses the photo or description of the “target” to be viewed. An example of a "target" could be: the pyramids of Giza at the
Extremely well controlled research has demonstrated that these sensory-emotional-conceptual experiences can be very strong and very accurate. Remote viewing has been used very successfully to locate previously undiscovered buried archaeological structures in the Mideast. It was used by the U.S. intelligence community to single-handedly accurately describe and locate a previously unknown about, new Russian submarine. When spiritual targets are viewed, such as the Buddha, people often have the most profound experience of their life.
Non-Locality
Remote viewing is an example of using the “non-local” abilities of the brain. It means the brain can and does non-locally connect and exchange information with what so far seems to be anything in the universe. For anyone unfamiliar with or skeptical about the brain’s non-local abilities, please pick up the book Entangled Minds by Dean Radin. (You will become aware of the huge amount of research and meta-analyses with staggeringly high levels of significance.) The implications of the non-local abilities of the brain/mind are so staggering that it will take many many years for them to dawn on people. Most people simply do not know what to do with the concept or they simply plug it in to a new age pre-rational belief system.
More Examples of What Can Be Remote Viewed
One can remote view one’s father or mother at the time when one was 10 years old. During this time, one can reconnect with one’s father in a totally new and healing way. One can also choose to walk in one’s father’s shoes and see the world through one’s father’s (or anyone else’s) eyes.
One can remote view the historical Buddha at the time of his enlightenment. While remote viewing the Buddha, some will feel entirely safe for the first time in their life. During this time, some will experience their heart being opened up on a very deep energetic level. Deep tears of joy are common for this kind of viewing.
While remote viewing a pod of Dolphins one may feel oneself swimming in the water while emotionally connecting with the rest of the pod. (A bipolar woman who remote viewed a pod of Dolphins was able to feel stable for the first time in her life. She was able for the first time to grasp the meaning of stability (creating a new prototype of experience for her self.)
One can remote view the eruption of Old Faithful geyser at a certain date and time. While remote viewing the Geyser’s eruption, one can experience droplets of water on one’s skin. One can feel the ground rumble with one’s whole body. One can hear the roar and sense the energy and power of the hot water being forced upward. One can look around the area and see, smell and hear the trees, the lodges and the people. One can sense the excitement of the people as they watch the eruption. One can pick out a particular onlooker and go inside his mind to find out what he was thinking. (Usually done with permission and with positive intent)
What is an Integral Perspective?
An integral perspective takes into account all aspects and levels of “reality”, the self and others. It tries to leave no aspect neglected. It takes into account our conscious states, our past current & future stages of development, the subjective and objective parts of ourselves, our society & culture, the physical universe, spirituality etc. It sees the importance of dealing with our shadow as well as having a spiritual practice that “transcends and includes”.
It discriminates between the pre-rational (much new-age stuff), the rational (including science) and the trans-rational (seeing the previously unseen (and un-see-able) by being exquisitely rational, intuitive, sensitive and discriminating as well as being highly awake and clear-headed)
Remote Viewing from an Integral Perspective:
This Means:
1) Conceptualizing and formulating remote viewing theory and techniques that take into account, conscious states, our stages & lines of development, our subjective experience, our society & culture, the physical universe etc.
2) Actually viewing "targets" relating to conscious states, our stages of development, our society & culture, the physical universe, the nature of the heart the mind and reality. It also means remote viewing that deepest ideas that can conceptualize these things.
3) It further means remote viewing therapeutic targets that:
a) help heal our shadow and
b) facilitate and accelerate our moving on to higher stages of development and taking new perspectives.
What is so remarkable about Remote Viewing from an Integral Perspective?
1) Taking previously impossible perspectives
Remote viewing remarkably allows one to see from first person, a second person, a third person and a fourth person perspective! One can do a “collective deep mind probe” to get a sense of what a whole group of people are thinking and feeling collectively. One can go inside the human body and observe microscopic events. One can potentially observe the activity of cells, viruses, molecules, atoms, and subatomic particles. The observation of dark matter, dark energy and other universes is conceivable through remote viewing. One could formulate extremely abstract targets involving concepts and perspectives relating to mathematics, other dimensions, and previously unconceived of notions. One can see conceivably through the eyes of future scientists, philosophers and intelligent nonhuman entities that may exist elsewhere in the universe.
2) Seeing the world through other people's eyes
As mentioned, one can see the world through the eyes of another being, for example you can see through the eyes of your parents, your spouse, an enemy, or a spiritual master, or someone on a much higher or even lower level of development. In this way one might accelerate one’s progression to their next developmental phase by putting a “crack in the door” and by creating "prototypical experiences" of the next stage. If you are remote viewing your spouse under "blind" conditions then you can conceivably discover your spouse through totally new and unbiased eyes. You can literally stand up and walk in his or her shoes. This has the potential of transforming your empathy and communication with the ones important to you.
3) Seeing the world through the eyes of your future and past selves
One can remote view oneself at a future level of spiritual-emotional-cognitive development. One can then see the world through the eyes of their future self. The same can be done for yourself at a past moment of time, for example your birth, or a past traumatic or enabling event. It is not uncommon for someone who is remote viewing their birth to want to curl up in a fetal position and cry like a baby without any prompting. Since this is done single blind or double blind, you beliefs about yourself won’t get in the way to distort your experience. New and powerful possibility exists of integrating past, present and future selves.
4) Learning from, experiencing and taking perspectives from the Future
Since the non-local abilities of the brain transcend time and space, it is possible to bring back information and perspectives from timelines that haven’t happened yet. This has been demonstrated in well-controlled research. This blows wide opens the possibilities of individuals and groups reaching developmental stages never reached yet. Higher, not yet conceived of, memes or stages can be accessed now and integrated into one's current world-view. Of course, when this happens the defacto timeline will change.
5) Go beyond taking different perspective to taking temporarily taking different Identities
You can Temporarily “blend” with the identity of another person such as an historical figure, a spiritual master or significant other. When one pass this once begins to see how transient identity is. This also facilitates not identifying so much with the personal ego. One can sense what it is like to simultaneously think the thoughts, have the intentions of, and feel the feelings of and have the body sensations of another person or even an animal. This takes the empathy to an entirely new level.
6) Creating “Prototypical Experiences”
Remote viewing offers the possibility of experiencing aspects of reality you have never experienced before, from a perspective you have never experienced before. On a feeling level this means feeling what you have never felt before. Most of us imagine that future experiences will in some way fit within the bounds of what we have experienced before. A remote viewing experience however, can be totally outside your current “reality box” or completely outside the range of experiences you’ve had before. Healing Prototypical experiences can be created during the remote viewing process.
Not having prototypical experiences early in life, for example, really feeling safe and secure, is one of the main things that blocks people from moving to higher stages of development. If you have never really felt safe in your life, part of you will be stuck in the past at that time where developmentally your safety needs should have been met. On the higher end of the developmental ladder one can have prototypical experiences necessary for the more highly developed parts of ourselves to move to the next rung of one's developmental ladder.
7) Seeing from several different perspectives simultaneously
When you are remote viewing you're using the brain in unknown ways. No one knows how the brain/mind accesses non-local fields. The physics of neuronal functioning and neuronal connections during remote viewing may not be understood for a long time. Occasionally during intense remote viewing sessions viewers often report being able to see an object from several sides at once. In this case, consciousness is functioning in a very unusual manner. It is hard for ordinary consciousness to even conceive of this possibility. Viewers also report something that has been referred to as a "thought ball". A thought ball is a form of cognition that arises that is holographic in nature. It contains many few points simultaneously plus many thoughts and cognitions simultaneously. The potential for this kind of comprehension is monumental and may even be part of future human developmental stages not yet reached.
8) Taking the non-local and paranormal out of the realm of belief or disbelief into the realm of actual direct experience
It is one thing to believe something or to understand it intellectually however, it is an entirely different thing to experience it. It is similar to studying and talking about a river vs. jumping in the river in swimming in the cool water. One can never fully grasp what a river is until one has swam in a river and felt it's currents. The actual experience accurately remote viewing an event and gaining a strong sense of presence at the target can be an experience that sends ripples through one's entire being for years to come. To not take into account up the fact that we are constantly interacting with a everything around us on and on local level is to ignore an important slice of reality and to make one's life smaller.
The implications of the non-local abilities of the mind are beyond profound.
9) Seeing things with relatively little bias, prejudgment, pre-categorization or belief
As mentioned before, when one remote views one does not known what the "target" is until after he views the target. This keeps the viewer completely open and honest in his approach. As soon as the viewer thinks he knows what the target is his session is doomed. He must continually stay open. Through practice, one can learn to approach what arises in one's own consciousness without bias and pre-categorization. After the session, one receives corrective feedback on which impressions were accurate and which were not. This approach is incredibly useful in other parts of one's life. It is important to approach most of what one encounters in life with a consciousness relatively free of bias and prejudgment and then be open to corrective feedback; this of course is something easier said than done.
10) Remote viewing issues, topics and questions of paramount importance. For example remote viewing: the nature of dark matter and dark energy, the omniverse, God, consciousness, DNA, and evolution
Remote viewing has large potential uses in virtually all disciplines and in all aspects of life. One need merely formulate an appropriate target relative to a particular question.
11) Remote viewing therapeutic issues topics and questions
One can remote view one's unconscious, the unconscious of another person, one's defenses and fears, one's blind spots, significance events in one's past, one's current or future spouse, possible choice points in one's future, one's true nature, departed loved one's, one's own death, oneself after death etc. etc.
12) Distinguishing between non-local "seeing" and ordinary imagining.
There is a large but subtle difference between actually seeing an object or event non-locally and just imagining it in the theater of your mind. This ability to discern can be extremely important when navigating through daily life using one's "intuition".
IN SUMMARY the possibility exists for the unheard of acceleration of movement into one's next level of development by accessing that which was not previously accessible. It opens the possibility of very long immersions in perspectives an emotional/spiritual states that were not previously accessible. These new kind of immersions maybe a key to accelerated stage change. This opens up a whole new area of research. This is a whole new field and frontier using a new highly sharpened tool that harnesses our ancient non-local abilities. Some of these possibilities have already been demonstrated in Dr. Carr's workshops.
Quotations and sayings from Dr. Carr
(Continually under construction)
"Most stimuli are really responses"
"Actualization first, other concerns second"
"That which is not allowed doesn't get heard"
"You have no business spending a lot of time in your head if you're not yet firmly based in your heart"
What is spirituality, really?
From my point of view, spirituality is "contactivity" and connectivity on many levels. It is a willingness to have contact with that which isn't known. It is a willingness to surrender to that which isn't known.
It is an acknowledgement of, and awareness of a sense of connection that seems to transcend linear thinking. It is an awareness of the power (and potential power) of this sense of connection. It is an awareness of the immediacy of this sense of connection. It is a willingness to explore this sense of connection.
It is allowing this sense of connection to occur when one walks, when one is face to face, when one is occupied, when one is feeling, when one is thinking, when one is quiet, when one is hurting, when one is sensing, when one is confused, when one is sensing amorphous energy. It is an awareness that the sense of connection can precede permeate and follow everything that arises in one's awareness.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
Integral Primaling
Under construction
Let us approach the topics of consciousness, emotion and spirituality with an attitude of openness and humility, with an intention to discover something fresh and new about ourselves and the universe. Let us question any previous conclusions and beliefs so that we can replace “been there, done that!” with “be here, discover this!”
We are all at different stages on our developmental ladders with many rungs behind us and many rungs yet ahead of us. What helped us up to the last rung may yet hold us back from the next. To climb to the next rung we must sometimes learn to see the world through new eyes, even when what we do is to help others see the world through new eyes. May we resonate with the universe in ever-changing and ever-transcending ways as “I”, “you” and “we” are revealed to ourselves and the world.
In our society, consciousness, spirituality, emotion and deep emotional processing are often attended to as separate realms with only some overlap. This can be a detriment to a total healing process. Sometimes delving into spirituality alone can even be used as a means of avoiding painful emotional feelings. On the other hand, sometimes people do deep feeling work and ignore their own spirituality and transpersonal abilities. Despite this, many who people primal have spiritual experiences during their primaling process. They can notice a radical change in their own consciousness and a deep sense of oneness with others and the universe after a deep primal. Obviously consciousness emotion and spirituality can deeply interface with each other during primaling and during other spiritual / conscious processes such as meditation.
This integral approach is timely because there is now a large body of well-controlled research in parapsychology and quantum physics that suggests that all particles and even consciousness itself, in fundamental ways transcend time and space. (referred to as “non-locality”). Science is showing that in fundamental ways everything is simultaneously connected; the heart, the mind, the body, the DNA and the universe.) For those of you who are more interested in the science supporting these connections please read past Princeton Professor Dean Radin’s recently published book “Entangled Minds”. It is now possible to approach and integrate these arenas, in grounded, non-flaky, mindful, and practical ways.
It is not an accident that people sometimes have "spiritual primal experiences” as well as “past life experiences”. As infants we were especially open and vulnerable to the spiritual, cognitive, emotional “non-local” energy around us. If this energy was overwhelmingly negative or not nourishing we had to close off to it and bury the pain (as we had to do for other kinds of emotional pain). Part of primaling is to regain these lost initial connections to this non-local energy, and to the universe around us.
When we regain our initial and current spiritual connections we can progress to higher emotional-spiritual developmental stages. As American philosopher Ken Wilber suggests, we need to move from the initial pre-rational, to the rational, to the trans-rational. During proper development the infant, toddler, child, adolescent, adult, and elder all unfold different forms of feeling spirituality and consciousness. This is all part of the waking up process both in ourselves and in our society. We can only perceive our world from the developmental level we are currently on.
Thursday, January 11, 2007
Common Psychological Defenses
(Guess what?, If you don't see any of this in yourself, of course it's a defense)
"Crystal balling": looking into the crystal ball of one's own imagination and determining one's behavior primarily from that. For example "I knew that that was probably what you would think, so I didn't bother." or " I didn't borrow your lawn mower because I knew you were going to borrow a lot of my stuff later on."
"Categorizing and dismissing": Perhaps the granddaddy of all defenses. Before you even realize it, your mind takes an impression or perception from the outside world places it in a box (category) and put it on a shelf. It never had a chance to be mindfully processed and you are only lucky if you ever get corrective feedback again. As the gap between a stimulus and it's immediate categorization narrows the defense becomes airtight.
"Talking oneself and in and out of things": Here you convince yourself of things; you try to come up with a good argument to talk yourself into something. You believe your own propaganda. You will to believe supersedes your will to really find out. You believe what you want to believe and unconsciously arrange and select facts in a way that fits your beliefs. You split yourself into "convincer" and "convincee". It's a dishonest state where it's too painful to admit what you don't know what to make the effort to really look.
"Wound oblivion": Here you are clueless to the extent of your own wounds. This is a very understandable state and is true for every one. It's just a matter of degree. You both convince yourself you're not wounded and your wounds are so encapsulated you are not even aware of them. If you were wounded at a time before you had the ability to cognize you'll have absolutely no conscious connection to the wound. For you, that wound will not exist. That part of yourself which has never seen the light of day will not and cannot exist to you.
"Decorating the prison walls": You suffer from "wound oblivion" and rather than dealing with your wounds and getting out of the prison of your wounds. You change "window dressing" thinking you're changing things on a deeper level. You talk yourself into believing you're making all sorts of marvelous changes.
"Sheathing the irrational in the rational": Deep confused irrational thinking is frosted over with a layer of rational appearing thoughts. All of a sudden we think we're making logical sense. It is too painful to look at our honest confusion.
"Blind spot denial" : Here one does not take into account the fact that when one navigates through the world one will have blind spots just as we have blind spots that our mirrors don't pick up on when we are driving. If you drive a car and you do not take into account your mirror blind spots you will eventually have an accident. In this blind spot blindness you "can't see the flies in your eyes because of the flies in your eyes". Similarly in falling for "The myth of the given" you believe that what you perceive has no or few blind spots and needs no further exploration or consulting with others for corrective feedback.
"The essential need for the active attainment of corrective feedback is given a low priority": Here one assumes that if feedback is needed for one's behavior it will be obvious and forthcoming. One does not need to actively check out one's assumptions. This defense allows a person to live in their own world and comfort zone and not have passed to change.
"Whistling in the dark": here one avoids the unknown, the undifferentiated, and the amorphous within oneself by clinging to the known or overlaying the unknown with the known. One holds onto easy explanations of what one sees and oneself. One may feel uneasy and in the dark (in the background) and one covers that feeling by telling oneself "this (whatever) reason must explain my experience, there's nothing to be deeply concerned about or afraid of".
"Denying the unexpressed": Here one becomes oblivious to unexpressed anger, appreciation, hurt resentment etc. They're not aware that anything needs to be expressed and they will report that they have nothing to express. Later on they will somatize what they didn't express by experiencing headaches, fatigue, withdrawal, muscle tension etc.
"Comfort zone addiction": Here "wussaholics" want to stay in their comfort zone at all costs. The status quo is held on to very tightly as a means of security. It is a defense against being overwhelmed that causes one to become overwhelmed even more easily as one's settles into it.
Much of what is out of one's comfort zone is looked on with distrust and as abnormal. The trying of new things is looked at as impractical sense what they do already "works" for them.
"Sugar Coating":
*
Wednesday, January 10, 2007
The Psychotherapy Process
Psychotherapy can last 2 weeks or 10 years. The psychotherapeutic process (with or without a therapist ) should go on the entirety of one's life. (Most people do not want to do 10 years of psychotherapy and most people need 10 years of psychotherapy.)
Some people just want some symptom reduction or problems solved so they can get back to where they were or want to be. That is OK. Some people want to grow and develop as far as possible. They want to heal all the wounds they can. They want all of themselves functioning at the highest level. (There's never a point at which you have arrived and cannot develop and grow further.)
That does not mean that you need a therapist at all times. The therapist does serve as a catalyst to reinstate self-healing and self-regulation, serves the function of being a witness to what needs to be witnessed, serves as a pair of eyes to help you see blind spots (and we all have lots and lots of blind spots), serves as a surgical blade to cut through what needs to be cut through, serves as a parent when you need re-parenting, serves as an educator when you need educating, a supporter and cheerleader when you need support, and a skillful frustrater when you resort to manipulation.
We come to therapy because we are discontented and/or because we want to grow. We want to alleviate painful things in our lives. Pure symptom reduction can, however, be problematic because, in certain cases, you can reduce symptoms at the cost of arresting your development. To grow you must go through a temporary period of healthy suffering and healthy frustration. If you go right to symptom reduction you cannot grow in this case.
Learning to process pain to our benefit rather than avoid it is crucial. Pain is the body-mind’s message: ‘pay attention to me” and “something needs attention”. It plays an important role in life. Unfortunately we live in a society that is very phobic toward pain and wants to medicate and alleviate it as soon as possible. However, when pain is intense enough it causes us to let go of our old coping skills and risk trying new ones. If you always take the edge off your pain with alcohol or another drug of choice, you will keep your old coping skills. A therapist role is sometimes to help you through this healthy suffering. An hour of healthy suffering can prevent months of unhealthy suffering. Healthy suffering opens the door to real happiness. There's no way to bypass this no matter what you've heard.
When we are not aware of the full extent of our pain we are also not aware of the full extent of our wounding. The amount of wounding goes unconscious inside of us and we redefine what is normal based on our baseline experiences in the baseline experiences of the people around us. The unconscious is the master of disguises and selective memory. In reality, what is considered normal is actually highly wounded. Very few escape wounding, even including most of the people who have memories of a happy childhood.
In general, when you come in for session you may or may not have something you want to focus on or work on. It is not required that you have some specific agenda to work on. Dr. Carr will give you his full attention and focus on the behavior, condition, feeling and concern that appears most prominent at the moment. The idea is that you, as a human organism, will present either consciously or unconsciously the thing that needs to be worked on the most. It is the job of the therapist to pick up on what it might be because a can be very subtle and very eluding at times to both the client and the therapist. Sometimes things like fear, shyness, distrust and resistance are the first things to present themselves in the first sessions. This can show up as body language, tone of voice, and type of eye contact. You're not being analyzed just caringly attended to.
The first phase of psychotherapy may have an emphasis on 2) Establishing rapport and trust by getting to know each other 1) The mutual setting of goals: general & specific, short term & long-term 2) Evaluation of all problems and their possible roots that go beyond the superficial. How much pain, dysfunction and discontent might there be really? 3) Education: the understanding of basic concepts & language and the achieving of emotional literacy. Ninety nine percent of people in our society are not emotionally literate, meaning that they do not have a basic understanding of how emotions work.
The second phase of psychotherapy involves going deeper into what is initially needed to begin healing. (This will probably be going on concurrently with the first phase). Sometimes the main thing that is needed is to be listened to without coaching or advice. The need to be heard and validated must often be addressed first. Sometimes what is needed is to have your own thoughts and feelings reflected back to you in a way that allows you to respond " yes that's what I mean. I'm so glad you really heard me!".
Before going further it will be better to go over a basic model of accessing and healing the self. This model will show what is approached as well as how and why it is approached. We are multi-level organisms and any truly deep and comprehensive therapy must deal with all levels. It is not enough to work on one level with the hope that the affect will effectively trickle up or trickle down to other levels.
Saturday, January 6, 2007
God / illusion
The very thing we seek is the essence of everything around us
There is no place in the universe which is not the very center of God
Like a child playing with the long veil of illusion, we learn to play hide and seek with reality
Such a fascinating game that, at one time, gently caresses us and loves us until we open our eyes,
and at another, walks us kicking and screaming through the painful primal fires that wake us up
Life itself won't leave us alone, forever beckoning us to see what has always been in front of our face
Unfold yourself to see what God has never seen and has always been
Chant the infinitely long sacred words of true emptiness and existence. This is the sound of God's voice
There is but one voice echoed in an infinite number of ways.
It is said the ear through which we hear God is the same ear through which God hears us
Now….. Just listen!!
The fabric of a young child's game never existed. That which is left, dies and is reborn in every vibration
No one is left
In the mundane is the highest celebration of God's presence
Now enjoy a piece of chocolate!
A Model of Reality
First: In writing this, I drawn on my: sense of making sense, my sense of connection, my sense of something speaking through me, my sense of nothing and my sense that it doesn't have to be perfect as it refines itself. Language does not have to be use precisely every time as long as the general intended idea is truly conveyed. Such thoughts, ideas and experiences will continue to draw preciseness to themselves. All forming gestalts, when given loving space, have a pull towards a lively and clear figure-ground before re-dissolving into the fertile void.
Second: All cookie cutters, molds and models that try to contain and explain reality will eventually overflow, burst at the seams, break and be swept away by dialectics operating on many many levels. They will all appear to be incomplete and primitive as we move to higher vantage points, which in part means we have developed more sophisticated cognitive structures in our brain. What is seen will always be in part a function of the seer and the kind and sophistication of the cognitions that form in his mind/brain which change his "perspective" and his "vantage point".
Apparent contradictions and dualities seen from lower vantage points tend to dissolve when seen from higher vantage points. From a higher vantage point the "hills" don't eclipse each other because you are looking down upon them. When a higher perspective is first seen from a lower perspective it often appears as irrational, airy ferry, unsubstantiated speculation, incomprehensible, nonsensical and delusional.
Anyone who rapidly categorizes and dismisses something that appears to be irrational and speculative falls into a huge trap that will permanently lock him into a lower perspective. They will be trapped by the pre-rational/trans-rational fallacy. It makes little difference how brilliant you are, if there are colors you have never seen or can't even imagine yet, you must forever question, sharpen and reformat your powers of discernment.
Third: Whenever the mind is used, on one level a hall of mirrors is created. From one point of view, the mind is created, at least in part, by connectivity in the brain. From another point of view the "actual brain" is merely an image that exists in the mind. The feeling of being "behind your face" is an image in the brain driven by sensory input and a separate sense of self generated by circuitry in the brain. However, the sense of there being an actual brain in an actual reality or the sense and belief that there is circuitry in the brain is in itself circuitry in the brain which in itself is an image in the mind and so on.
Forth: the mind, its contents and perceptions appear to be more than constructions and structures, they are processes and resonations. We have information, patterns and perspectives dancing, resonating and co-varying (locally & non-locally) with information, patterns and perspectives from all four quadrants!
Tenets:
Number one: Primary Existence: flux, flow, resonation and structure containing all perspectives and no perspectives, containing all potentials and no potentials, containing the potential for all wholes and all parts, containing all information and no information, containing all existence and no existence, containing all consciousness and no consciousness, containing crystallizations and de-crystallizations, containing all potential timelines. All fully complete and fully incomplete. Emptiness and form.
Number two: Your nervous system: a temporary crystallization of existence which both resonates with, and models aspects of primary existence on both local and non-local levels. It is a function of the multi dimensional organism.
Number three: The primary programming of your nervous system which allows for pure non-dualistic subject object and no-mind (non-dualistic self). It resonates with the nervous system.
Number four: The secondary programming of your nervous system. The programming of the programming which allows for the experience of mind and the experience of a self. It is our internal "holodeck" within which the self navigates. It resonates with the primary programming.
Number five: All four levels are parts of primary existence in their own right.
Number six: Congruent Resonation: (the cascading connection and synchronization of smaller fields of consciousness with larger fields of consciousness)
as secondary programming (the self) resonates more fully with the primary programming (non-dualistic self)
and as the primary programming resonates more fully with the nervous system
and as the nervous system resonates more fully with primary existence on both a local and non-local level
resonation becomes congruent, connected and unitary and thus consciousness itself becomes congruent, connected and unitary.
Number seven: Unitary consciousness: all smaller fields of consciousness can become exquisitely nested in, and more fully resonating with the larger fields. The "hall of mirrors" is dissolved and re-emerged, included and transcended. The primary existence of all things can be "resonated with". This is also possible on a quantum non-local level because all existence is "co-located" on that level.
Number eight: Resonation and exquisite nesting are always evolving and are never complete. Resonation and exquisite nesting non-locally deeply influence timelines, hence timelines themselves are always evolving and are never complete.
Number nine: Within this infinite incompletion is exquisite completion (the great "oh my!" of God discovering himself, spaciousness and bliss, before we were born and after we die.) If if