The Four Quadrants

The  Four Quadrants
The Four Quadrants

Thursday, December 31, 2009

Identity Confluence

A basic source of emotional pain is what I call "identity Confluence" or "Identity blending". We start out in life with undifferentiated identities. Gradually on we learn to differentiate between ourselves, our mother and our father. Most of the time, at one or more level we remain undifferentiated.

When we form bonding relationships later on in life, we again create an "identity confluence" on an unconscious level and the other becomes "I". Consciously we can make the differentiation but consciously we have a hard time. When the "other" evoke childhood anger or another emotion, that emotion gets directed back on the self at a deeper level because the "other" is not differentiated from the self. These "knots" can be fully untied through deep primal work.

The trick is......

The trick is:

1)to try to see the TRUTH of what the other person is saying even MORE (and in greater depth)than they can see it themselves

2)so that this truth becomes a positive ADDITION to (not a denial or non-acknowledgment of) the truths you already "know"!

3) Then do the real work of chewing on and integrating (get out of your comfort zone!)

4) only then spitting out what appears false by now (Seeing the truth of what appears false)

5) Creating a new improved, higher vantage point from which to see truth (truthfulness)

6)Realizing the "eternal truth" that cognitive vantage points MUST always change as a natural function of the healthy human organism's metabolism and that

7) "stuckness" is another word for anti-life.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Two Main Styles of Coping

Two main styles of coping are: 1) to move ones "squelch-line" above ones level of pain and become delusional about oneself (and hence delusional about the world) 2) to reduce ones pain below ones squelch-line and no further and be in denial about oneself and hence the world.

The Four "Purposes" of Life

The four "purposes" of a human life are: 1) to "organismically" find ways of dealing with ones pain in order to fully heal ones wounds 2) to find & develop ones "gifts" 3) to give back from ones own gifts 4) to transcend both purpose and meaning by moving into the "trans-purposeful" and "trans-meaningful" in order to fully participate in the "dance" which is meaningful & meaningless and neither.

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